This post is written by a friend who has personally struggled with the issue of pornography. I asked her to write about this because she has such a heart and passion for people who have struggled or are currently struggling with the lie that is pornography. This is an issue that needs to be talked about more, especially among young women as it is stereotypically seen as a problem only men deal with.
I’m 17 years old, a junior in high school, enjoying a sleepover with my best friend. Girl talk leads to serious talk, which leads to her opening her computer. That night was my first exposure to pornography, and I’m sad to say it was far from my last. Thus began my struggle.
That’s why I’m writing this article, that’s why I care so much, it’s because I’m not looking at this struggle from somewhere on the other side of the playing field. I’m not disconnected from this battlefield. I don’t preach to you as someone inexperienced with the temptation. I’m here, fighting with you. Fighting for my purity and for my mind. I’m the reason I can promise you this isn’t just a guy’s issue anymore. I’m the reason I know that more people that you comprehend struggle with porn. Our motivations may be different than guys, but the struggle is the same.
There are some things I want you to know, some costs I want you to count before you watch pornography. You can chalk this whole article up to my religious background, but I can tell you I’ve suffered non-religious consequences.
1-- Porn is addicting. Once you start, you will not want to stop. Like other addictions it gives you an outlet for your pain, your boredom, or whatever else leads you into destructive behaviors. Before you know it, every time you feel a negative emotion you will be drawn to porn.
2-- Your self-image will be damaged. You can’t stare at perfect women having perfect orgasms and expect it not to take a toll on how you see yourself. Watching porn is an open door to you not only objectifying other women, but objectifying yourself. You will see your every imperfection and you will forget to have grace for yourself. It will hurt, and some days it will make it hard for you to leave the house. If you’re watching porn, I can almost guarantee you struggle with body image. It feeds on your sense of worthlessness and threatens to consume you.
2b-- Social anxiety will arise. Anxiety you never had before, and it’s closely tied with your growing insecurity. You’re afraid people will know or find out what you’re doing behind closed doors. You’ll analyze other women, you’ll barely be able to express yourself around them. You’ll become a shadow of who you know you can be,
3-- Your tastes will develop and shock you. Porn by nature is a gateway, as you watch it, you’ll have to watch more to get the same high. It will have to be new and different to satisfy. Until the point that you shock yourself at what you watch. You’ll be ashamed, but desperate for a sense of relief. As you try to quit because you’re disgusted with yourself your stress will double, like an addict going through withdraw.
This is a fight we as women cannot ignore any longer. I promise if you aren’t watching porn, someone close to you is deep in the struggle. Let us not close our eyes anymore and marginalize ourselves from the problem. It’s real and it’s here. I heard a quote once from a college professor that said “You’re only as sick as your darkest secrets” as long as you hide in the dark this addiction will always be on the verge of consuming you. It will drive you farther and farther until you barely recognize yourself. I urge you to find help, find someone you trust, and don’t allow this to steal your joy any longer. There is peace and healing to be found. Chase after the light!
Fight!
If you would like information about the author, please feel free to email me at m.mccaughey2@hotmail.com
If you would like more information about the effects and dangers of pornography use, please visit Fight the New Drug
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